the first one i wrote at sea

We have been at sea for the past 3 days or so – we got on the ship in Barcelona on Monday afternoon, and we have been here since. It has been a completely amazing experience, from the time our flight landed in Barcelona, a city I’d never been to before up until this moment, and I don’t see any reason to imagine it would stop being so until we finally get off the boat next week.

The first glimpse of the massive ship, knowing that it would be our home for the next week was breath-taking. I know that cruises have become pretty ordinary these days, but you still have to pause when you consider that you will be taking to sea, and residing on one of them for days on end. Its even more striking when you consider that you’re in what is effectively a floating hotel with most of the comforts of home: hot showers, meals, a gym, nightclubs, swimming pools, a casino and heaven knows what else. And then there’s the fact that you will go to set off from one city, and wake up in a completely different place, with possibly a different language and different cultures. The Ritz and the Waldorf certainly don’t offer that!

Most remarkable for me has been the journey itself. We have been at sea since we left Valencia last night, and we have not spotted land at all in that time. Our next port is Tunis, which we should arrive at tomorrow morning. I find it daunting when I look in the horizon and see nothing but water. I brought my binoculars with me, in hopes of spotting distant objects, but so far, all we have seen is the vast emptiness of the Mediterranean Sea. Well, at one point, my wife and I did spot a giant turtle swimming alongside the ship, which my wife joked was doing more drifting than swimming – couldn’t argue with that observation. (Lol. Smart woman, my amazing wife).

It is quite humbling when you consider that this massive ship that looked like a total colossus when it was sitting in its berth, is actually just a tiny speck in the massive waters. It makes you realise how insignificant man is in the grand scheme of things (at least in my mind), because our planet is covered by water, and all of our inventions, skyscrapers and 6,000 crew aircraft carriers could (God forbid) be swallowed up by the water without a trace. There is more water on earth than land, can you imagine that? And there are huge creatures living in the depths, which dwarf anything we see on land!

These are the sort of thoughts I have been contemplating since last night. Once again, insomnia grabbed hold of my eyelids and welded them wide open, so I had a lot of time to ponder. We also spent the entire day at sea today, so I’ve had over 18 hours now to consider how ephemeral my entire life is when compared to the vast, open sea. Its something I’m hoping to always remember, when I get caught up in all the things that life throws at me. My wife has pointed out that I don’t know how to relax, and I’m hoping the memories of this journey, and the sights of the wide and amazing nothingness will help me to remain grounded.

Remember, no matter who you are, regardless what you do or own, you’re ultimately less than a drop in the ocean (I’m not sure I like that thought though).

(I haven’t written in so long that I feel absolutely rusty.)

Never leave me
[whispers conveyed on the wind]
Never leave me, please, i beseech Thee
without You i am alone,
hopelessly lost in turbulent, unyielding seas
and soon dead by the hands of him who seeks
nothing else.

Never let me, stray
beyond the paths where Your eyes can see
[earnest, fearful thoughts from a heart in wonder
and wander]
i know that You know all things;
ever-watchful eyes that never tire.
I know that You had knowledge before
anything was, that ever became
these things are irrefutable truths
in my heart.

Never let me forget
just how great You are,
how much You mean to me
[i appreciate You]
i have never known anyone like You,
its certain that i never will,
[breathes]
Never let me forget,
that all that i am,
is naught without You.
I love You
[i truly do]


[moments of wonder. 1258.06022007]



Never leave me, please, i beseech Thee
without You i am alone...

Never let me, stray

beyond the paths where Your eyes can see...
i know that You know all things

Never let me forget
that all that i am,
is naught without You....


i randomly found this old old post this morning, and it could not have come at a better time. sometimes you feel alone; sometimes you are afraid, and you need to be comforted by the assurance that God is out there, looking our for you, even when its not immediately obvious. having read this, i feel much better. i hope this feeling lasts.

words

Its true.
Every day. Every night.
Through every hour of every day.
And in every moment in between.

Like rain.
The sun.
Like the lights of the night sky.
And through every moment of our existence.

Like everything.
Every little something
Added up.
There's too much to count.

Substance and Volume. Beyond every known measure.
Whole.
But Intangible.

In its core, it's a song
That only the soul could sing
For the heart has no words.
To tell its stories.

Its real. Too real.
Like every moment that we live.
Its more than words could say.
And more than i could ever truly say.

120309102012

words

sing a new song
everyday
write a new story
find the strength to dance
merrily
live your life to the full
 - every single day.

yesterday
yesterday is beyond redemption
i looked at the clock
a million times
this hour just past
it did not pause even for a second
despite my desperate pleas
"ZELA! Palado...."
Time will not reverse its course
not for a King
nor Prince
nor Priest
of a surety
not for you and me.

mbula ebeti.

it was not so long ago
the world was right
or was it?
did life not change
in the time it took
for the lungs to pull a few breaths?
it was a moment
it was a lifetime
it was the beginning of forever
it no longer matters.

let us embrace this reality
let us no longer deny our truth

and
let us
make the best of the days ahead
while there is yet life in us
let us shape our tomorrows
with all that we have at hand.
never forget to dream
i want to fill the future with joyful memories
to relive in the twilight of my years
this is all i have.

malili

there is wisdom in the whispers of elders
and the screams of babes
the wind howls the same
every season
without ceasing
"if it is meant for you, it will never pass you by"
the choir sings the same song of hope
the music flows past like the water
cold comfort to empty hands
and a heart that wishes
desperately
that you were still here
to hold
regardless what was written
before our paths ever crossed.

some say
that
destiny speaks
through our desires
and the answers to our prayers
this is my path
as fate dictates
"monkano na ngai te
 monkano ya Nzambe
 botika koswana."
Faith tells me
when anguish grabs my heart
in its unforgiving grip.

mbula ebeti.

maybe dreams are all we need
i will not turn my back on happiness
what else is there to do?
nalela
i carry you in my heart
your music lives in my ears
even though my head fights to forget
your sound, your smell, your smile
my you...
i will forget!
one day,
you will be a vague memory.
one day
i pray.

nazali kobela.

it is true
a man who does not know where he is going
will never know that he has arrived
nalela
there is no room for blame
only time to look
for direction
where does this road lead
is it written in the stars
did i really journey past home
stumbling wandering in the dark
could i lose my way
how could i lose my way?
nalela.

why did no one tell me?

nakolala

i shall
sing a new song
everyday
write a new story
and dance
merrily.

i shall
make new memories
every day

nakobina.


095631122011

words

music. esta vida loca.so this is how the story went. beaute ya mwana moto. that i could. when the day is done. forever. motema na ngai polele. your face. okoti lokola mpena. i cannot hide. just like you cannot deny. the morning sun. like everything. i've never known. this is how it is. with me. just like. i feared. it would go. you. would go. bolingo eyi nzela molayi. molayi.

i thought. we would write. a different song. bolingo eyi nzela molayi. someday. your name. singer songwriter sunday morning. sweet bliss. spero che tumi ami veramente. then this building. could drift out to sea. it wouldn't matter. not to me. estoy totalmente perdido sin ti. espero que me amas enverdad. it would mean everything. 

motema lizipa maloba. instead we talked. estees mi destinio. count your blessings. even if it seems the world is ending. hii ni maisha yangu. hii ni hatima yangu. the world is ending. ataobo kotala ngai. misou eko tossa te. you cannot hide, the morning sun. patient eyes. no more. na fungoli bizipele hi. even if. the world is ending. vamos por el camino que elegimos. 

i fear some days. je ne peux pas vivre sans toi. i never stop walking. Nzambe a zongisa mokola a liwa ngai sima. whatever you do. things have changed. bolingo eyi nzela molayi. molayi. the world is not the same. 

may your life. be filled. with sweet happiness. motema lizipa maloba. mosala se kokolisa. may the music. never stop. and i hope. you dance. without reluctance. forever. selah.

01072012

random

This is really you. No doubt. This is really who you are. There's no denying it. Truth has finally spoken. I have no longer, any questions or doubts, because I have seen you in all your glory. This is you.

in my head, mi amor

this song has been in my head for the past couple of years now, and nothing seems to be able to dislodge it. i went through my bollywood music phase (i hate you uzo!) and that's passed. my wizkid phase. the garth brooks double live cd period came and went, but this song continues to play in my head, and therefore in my ears. over and over again. at some point i got so obsessed that i tracked down the words, and then an english translation (thank you and God bless you Mangolens.

i'm certain that most of my friends who have heard this song from time to time have thought, "could this idiot get any more random if he tried, what the hell is this?" i also have a few who absolutely love it (oya clap for yourself and give Jesus a wiper!). lol. my musical tastes are

why i love the song is simple. its beautiful. beyond the music, the words are simply stunning. the voices of papa wemba and his protege koffi olomide compliment each other perfectly.

there's no official video, but youtube has a few clips from live performances of the song. some of them are quite hilarious.

here's one i found right here







Mi Amor – Koffi Olomide and Papa Wemba (English Translation)



“Mi Amor”

Papa Wemba/Koffi Olomide



Click below to listen to the song.

Mi Amor – Koffi Olomide and Papa Wemba



Bolamusa ni Elodie na mpongi

Wake Elodie up

Mabele ma koyoka mela elelo ya mwana mobali

The earth can hear a man weep

Na mongongo ya Mpokwa

In his evening voice

Bolingo eyi nzela molayi, molayi

Love is a long path, long…



Ba tombolaka nango mosapi te

You don’t take it for granted

Yango eyali te mungwa na bileyi

It is not salt in food,

Omeki e kangi,

You try once and it works (tastes right at first try)

Elodie eh, na beteli yo libaku eh

Elodie, I’ve met my match





Mi Amor ehh. Mwana ya mama

Mi amor, Momy’s girl

Ngai lokola yo ndeko ndenge moko

Me and you are like relatives

Motema lizipa maloba, mosala se kokolisa

These feelings make me speechless, and they keep growing

Mi Amor eh, Bolingo

Mi Amor, Love…

Makila e kotambola ngai na nzoto

I am having chills

Mpe Bolingo eko yenga yenga na motema

And love is racing my heart

Eko kobwanaka na moto se liwa

Only death will stop it



Na kufi nano te, tika na meka

But I am yet to die, so let me have a taste

Ngai mpe na yeba, Sukali ya bolingo

So I can also know the sweetness of love

Mi Amor,

Monkano na ngai te, monkano ya nzambe,

It is not my choice, it ‘s God’s (destiny)

Elodie, Viens dans mes bras

Elodie, Come in my arms



Moto oyo balingaka,

The person we love,

Balobaka mabe naye na miso ya bato te,

You never talk bad about in front of others

Bolamo na ye,

Their goodness

Ba bomba yango obe na motema

You keep to your heart

Tout ca, c’est toi…Elodie nyanga Dubert,

This is all you…Elodie



Mi Amor ehh. Mwana ya mama

Ngai lokola yo ndeko ndenge moko

Motema lizipa maloba, mosala se kokolisa

Mi Amor eh, Bolingo

Makila e kotambola ngai na nzoto ngo

Mpe Bolingo eko yenga yenga na motema

Eko kobwanaka na moto se liwa ah

Na kufi nano te, tika na meka

Ngai mpe na yeba, Sukali ya bolingo

Mi Amor,

monkano na ngai te, monkano ya nzambe,

Elodie, Mais viens dans mes bras



Awa Ba Mama bakoyokaka boye

After mothers have heard this,

Ba Kolukaka ndenge yak o bongisa kitambala na moto te

They’ll only be trying to readjust their headgears (they won’t believe what they hear)



Ebandaki na misso,

It started with the eyes

Monoko e kozua releve

And then the heart took over

Nzoto, moteme ekoti motambo

Body and heart have been trapped

Na boyi ko mentir oh

I do not want to lie

Sentiment Elodie ye moko e kokumba ngai

Elodie, my feelings have taken over



Losambo na ngai se moko

I only have one prayer

Nzambe a zongisa mokola a liwa na ngai sima

May good give me long life

Na tika ko zua temps

So that I can have time

Yako simba na maboko

To touch with my hands

Oro oyo nzambe akela yango na forme ya moto,

The gold God has made in human form

Elodie, Elodie…



Viens te blottir dans mes bras

Come curl yourself up in my arms



Mi Amor eh! Yambi Mama

Mi Amor, Let’s hug

Beaute ya Mwana moto

Beautiful child

Okoti lokola mpena ah

You’ve entered me like a breath (enters lungs)

Oyo mbangu mbangu oloni

You’ve planted quickly

Nzente ya malili

A pleasant tree



Mi amor eh! Mbongue ya mayi oyo se yo

Mi Amor, You are a wave (water)

Ata obo kotala ngai

Even if you refuse to look at me

Misou eko tossa te

Your eyes won’t lie

Na juger te, Elodie

Elodie, I am not judging

Na pessi se promesse eh!

I am just making a promise



Mi Amor eh! Maboko na ngai polele

Mi Amor, My arms are open

Motema na ngai polele oh!

My heart is open too

Na fungoli bizipele hi!

I’ve opened all that was closed

Pona oya kokota ah!

So you can enter

Na beleli yo oh!

I am yelling out

Viens dans mes bras aha! (4x)

Come in my arms



Djuke Mwana a mwasi

Cherie Coco

Oyoki Boloko a picler

Rendez vous a la Godart?



Oh! Ba staff na ngai na Kin

Romino makassi

Aladji Djambo

Dongo Dim

Apocalypse



Na se ya lidame

Under the tree

Ba oya bisso batwa makolo

For us earthlings

Rendez-vous obe wana

Rendez vous there

#503

there was a time
when i would always ask,
"is this really you?"
- because i could never understand.

that time has long passed us by
if we learned nothing
from the lessons taught in pain
at least we have our scars
to prove that we once fought wild beasts.
if we live to be called "old men"
they will be witnesses
of our torturous journey

there was a time
when i would always ask
"is this really you?"
i knew you not
even though you marched beside me
through 2 campaigns
your sweat mixed with my blood
we laboured for our very lives together
 - yet i did not understand.

the years have shown us much -
there was a time
when i would always ask
"is this really you?"
because i never could understand.
now i can say,
"this is who you are"
i have seen you do
the same thing over and over
- and i still can never understand

this is who you are
i can never understand
but i know.
i understand.
i do. now.
(i think).




010019032012

#491

i'm not afraid to say that i feel lost; that i'm in a place that i don't really understand, a road that feels completely unfamiliar with landmarks that mean nothing.

i'm not afraid to say that what i have questions, but no answers, there's mud on my shoes, and mud on my clothes, and mud on my face and mud in my hair, and under the nails on every finger of my hands.

i'm not afraid to stand at crossroads, and i' not afraid of moving - to stand still is to die.

i'm not afraid to tell you exactly how i feel - indeed, that is the point. i need you to listen, and to tell me how you see it. i need you to help me figure this out, because i am afraid that time is too precious to waste,